Stuff That's Happening and Other Thoughts

1. This is my fifth year teaching band. Yesterday, I stood in front of my band and asked them to sit patiently and quietly while we spent about 15 minutes taking up forms, passing out forms, and a few other administrative things. For the first time EVER in my teaching career, they did exactly what I told them. They sat there patiently and didn't say a peep. I didn't even think that was possible. I can't believe how awesome my group is this year. This might be the first year I don't spend my free time thinking about what other career path I could take.

2. There is a good possibility that I might try optimism this year. I'm still on the fence about it. Is it ironic that I feel pessimistic about trying optimism?

3. There is no substitute for hard work.

4. If you have all the latest technology, a gaming system, a data package on your cell plan, new clothes, a nice car, a nice house, a huge flat screen television, the ability to take a vacation, and the luxury to eat out EVER.......then you are not broke and shouldn't pretend that you are. I'm going to venture a guess that you are able to swing $30 a month for your kid to have a trumpet. And don't act like you didn't have 4 months notice to take care of the necessary arrangements. Get with the program and get involved in your kid's life.

5. Parents will be the reason that my quest for optimism will be challenging. Seeing kids flourish in spite of their ridiculous parents may be the reason it succeeds.

The Upside of 30

A few weeks ago I was really struggling with bidding adieu to my 20's. Being an eternal pessimist, this was a natural for me. So I am trying to embrace the positive aspects of being 30 and trying to make things work in my favor. Here are some things I know for sure:

on being single......

It's hard being a single, working 30 year old girl. It's also fabulous. It means I work harder, but it also means I can play harder. After working a 50+ hour week, I am the only one that can cook meals, clean the house, do the laundry, take out the trash, pay the bills, and shop for groceries, all while trying to maintain some sort of semblance of a life. It isn't easy and I don't always do it with the grace that makes people comfortable. On the upside, I pretty much do what I want, when I want, and I don't allow people to let me feel guilty about the self-indulgent things I do to recharge my soul. You have a family that loves you and helps you shoulder the load of life, and I have pedicures, margaritas, cute shoes, and the ability to fly by the seat of my pants and go where ever I want to go whenever I want to go there. Maybe that sounds a little materialistic, but if you were a 30 year old single working girl, you would have (and need) all of these things, too.

on life........

It is amazing what the learning curve has been up to this point in life. Major changes occur between 18 and 24. A different sort of major change occurs between 24 and 29. I would not trade my experiences for ANYTHING. I have no regrets about the choices I've made for my life. I have not always chosen the easy path, but struggling has built character. Taking a more difficult path as led to some great experiences and some great friends. And it's true that the harder you work, the greater the reward. I think that now, more than ever, it is important for young women to have a sense of self and independence. There are a lot of girls out there that never learn important life skills because they never had to. If I had to offer a piece of advice to young girls just graduating high school I would say: Learn to do things by yourself, be involved in something in college besides your boyfriend, and learn how to read a map. If you can do all of those things, then you won't have to settle on someone not good enough for you and have the confidence to go live your life and find a man worth while. There are going to times in life when things get scary, but all you really need to get out alive are confidence and good friends. And if that doesn't work, then at least you know how to read a map so you can move on to the next experience. Don't settle being comfortably miserable.

on work and career..........

Now that I'm 30, I'm not the new gal anymore. I feel like the past year was a milestone year where I gained confidence and learned that I know way more than I was giving myself credit for. My job is more mentally and emotionally draining than anything. There are days when it is worth it and there are days when it is not. I think I've come to the realization (and have succumbed to the fact) that I am a masochist and I love it. I know that I said this earlier, but the harder you work, the greater the rewards. And it's true. I got the once in a lifetime opportunity to open a new school and pretty much had the odds stacked against me. But I worked my butt off and made it something I can be proud of. Even though I cried more than care to admit, I complained, I kicked and screamed, and I comforted myself with too much chocolate, I did it. And the modest success that we have achieved feels more rewarding to me because I DID IT. I wouldn't have it any other way. I am a very intense and passionate person and there is no endeavor in my life that I will face passively and half heartedly. I work hard because I want to. I work hard because I have to. I work hard because I don't want my name associated with mediocrity. I work hard because no one else is going to work hard for me. I work hard because of the satisfaction I feel at the end of the day. It is not my style to advance my career by rubbing elbows or stroking egos. It is my style to work hard as hard as I can, learn as much as I can, and help out as much as I can. Hard work hasn't done me wrong yet.