Sunday, March 29, 2009

One Woman's Opinion

I really don't like going back to Pittsburg. I really don't. I always dread going and when I am there I like to just stay at my parent's house and not venture into town. I'm rarely there at the same times as my old friends, and I can keep up with them on Facebook anyway, and the few things I liked about the town when I lived there are now gone. It has nothing to do with my family - I just don't like Pittsburg. I'm writing this blog because of a few different things I experienced yesterday....and I wasn't even in Pittsburg - I was in Tyler. For all of eight hours.

There is a certain small mindedness that is present in smaller towns. I know that there are small minded people in big cities, too, but it is way easier to avoid them when you live in the 4th largest metro area in the nation. Not so easy to avoid in the second smallest county in Texas. Life is just different over there. I never felt like I fit in. Not at the high school, but in the town. I actually really liked my classmates and never felt like the sterotypical band nerd that I was. I think we had a great class all through school, and looking back I feel like everyone got along for the most. It was always the adults that made me feel uncomfortable. I felt like there were certain teachers at school and people around the community that were never going to give a crap about me because my parents didn't have money and status in the community, or because I wasn't an athlete. I just felt like kids were automatically written off by a lot of people if they were from a certain part of town. It's a lot harder to teach a kid that doesn't get to eat breakfast, or that doesn't have a father at home because they are in jail, or that has to take care of younger siblings because mom has to work late, or that sees things on a daily basis that some of us only see on TV crime shows. I truly felt that a lot of kids were not given the same opportunities and were given up on quickly and at an early age simply because of their demographic. Not by everyone, but I would be comfortable saying a majority of the community. And this was just accepted. And this doesn't happen just in Pittsburg, it happens all over the state and the country and the world. (This is one reason why I love the intermediate school I work at. Our administration is TRULY dedicated to leaving no child behind. It's hard work and emotional work, but we share the philosophy that despite a student's demographic they are all able to learn and deserve the same chance as more fortunate students to better their lives and end the cyle of poverty.) I really think I recognized this divide at a young age and didn't like it. It just felt like if you weren't somebody, then you were nobody. There was no in between. Again, this is simply my personal perspective and opinion.

What prompted all of this reflection and thought? While I was in Tyler this weekend my mom had a copy of the March 26, 2009 addition of the Pittsburg Gazette. I browsed through it and came across a section called "One Man's Opinion", written every week by Roy Knox. The title of this week's article was "The Truth is Well Hidden". He discussed how people at all levels of government, local and national, have pulled the wool over our eyes to hide the truth. He cited examples from past school borad elections to the more recent AIG bonus scandals and made sure to tie that to the Obama administration. He called Barney Frank "that fat mouth from Boston". He ended this section with, and I quote, "Lies and poor judgement, is that what this administration meant by "change."" Then, next to the article about lies is a section titled "What were you thinking?" with seven different opinions or points that I am guessing he wants to make. I supose I would need to be a more frequent reader of the Gazette to understand what this section is really about, but I'll do my best to sort it out for you. Here are a few of the bullet points:

1. Question: The new ball fields were paid for with taxpayer money, so why are the gates locked so we can't use them over the weekend? Answer: Are you really that dumb? Your family tree must look like a telephone pole. Police and fire dpartment vehicles, and city buildings are all paid with taxpayer money, but you can't drive the cars or live in the buildings.

2. Pope Benedict, after arriving in Africa, told reporters that condoms "increase the problems" of AIDS. He was quickly criticized by doctors and politicans as unrealisitc, unscientific, and dangerous. The Catholic Church would be better served if they clean up their own house before dispensing advice to the world. He needs to get rid of that goofy hat and get him a Notre Dame cap; it would help his image.

4. I didn't expect Texas to play that well against Duke. If they had shot free throws better, they would be advancing to the next round.

5. One out of three adults are obese is what I read the other day, while at the hospital. The other day 90 percent of the poeple we saw were obese and they weren't even patients.

So number one and number two were pretty condescending if you ask me. I know there are a lot of stupid people in the world that ask stupid questions and get their panties in a wad over things that they are ignorant of. However, you sound much more intelligent when you simply educate them of the facts rather than issue a condesceding statement. And seriously? He really went there about the pope??? I happen to agree that the comments made by the pope are unrealistc and unscientific. However, you can make the point without pigeon-holing the entire Catholic Church and calling his traditional mitre goofy. I'm anxious to find out if any of the few Catholics is Pittsburg will write a letter to the editor about taking offense to the comments. So he basically saying that people in glass houses shouldn't through stones. But he's in a glass house.........throwing stones.......What's next? Telling the ALL Muslims to take of their goofy head scarves and stop flying planes into buildings? I wonder what the Baptists in town would think if I told them to put down that goofy book they always read and open their eyes about how unrealistic and unscientific anti-abortion laws are. I know what would happen - and that's exactly why I don't live in Pittsburg anymore. So anyway, he goes to make an observation about a basketball game and obesity, which for the life of me I can't figure out what his point actually is. My Dad, along with many other men in Pittsburg, have a lot of small minded opinions about many of the same topics. They don't have a weekly column in the paper. Perhaps he has this column because he shares the same opinion with so many other people in the town and they enjoy reading what he has to say. (Except for maybe the Catholics that don't molest their children and live completed normal lives.) If this is case, then go ahead and mark that down as yet another reason why I don't live in Pittsburg anymore. So what qualifies this guy to give opinions on anything from sports to medical issues to politics and beyond? He's married to publisher of the paper.

I leave you with this thought: Opinions, like excuses, are like ass holes - everyone has one. Any idiot can have an opinion, but an intelligent and persuasive person will use discretion and facts when expressing one.


Sunday, March 22, 2009

Ketchup Blog

Get it, ketchup? Haven't blogged in a while.....it kills with the 6th graders.
I just haven't been in a blog mood and I haven't had a whole lot going on except work. Here are some facts to catch you up on my life:

1. Spring break was awesome! It was so nice to be at home and nurture the non-band director side of myself.
2. I love Blue Moon beer now.
3. I'm still madly in love with Zach Braff.
4. I had a crush on TJ Holmes from CNN until I found out his daughter is in our band.
5. I'm actually having fun at work for the first time.
6. I cut myself with a knife tonight. This is the first time I've ever cut myself and I was kinda freaking out.
7. I'm cautiously optimistic for the first time in life. I'm finally wrapping my brain around the fact that I'm not the new guy (or gal) anymore and I know more than I've been giving myself credit for.
8. Turning 30 in a few months is freaking me out. However, I want to have a huge party and invite everyone I've ever known. That means you. Yes, you.

Wednesday, January 28, 2009

Ice Day Blues

A free day off from school. Could have been a great day. I had a pancake brunch and watched some HGTV and had every intention of being productive in the afternoon. Then suddenly I had one sneeze that turned into the allergy attack of the decade. Luckily, I had some benadryl on hand in case I had an allergic reaction to the pain meds from the wisdom teeth surgery, but it just knocked me out for the whole afternoon. I wasn't going to get anything done around the house any way, so no harm no foul, I guess. I'm feeling a little better now and I guess I should be glad I was able to rest at home instead of being miserable at school. Wednesday is my least favorite day of the week anyway, so it was nice to have a little unexpected break on one, even if my nose is now currently red, raw, and sensitive to the touch.

Sunday, January 25, 2009

First Life Lesson of 2009

It became apparent to me on over the course of the past week that I need to trust my gut more. Since day one of teaching I've been insecure 90% of the time about not being good enough. I have felt out of my league with my small town East Texas roots. I am constantly self-evaluating because I always think I'm doing something wrong. Other parts of this insecurity stem from the fact that I feel my students are a reflection of my teaching and I equate their successes or failures with my teaching abilities. This means that if some ding-a-ling 11 year old still can't recognize an A on the staff that it is somehow my fault and if someone finds out one of my students can't read an A on the staff that they will think that I'm a ding-a-ling, too. Well, I think I finally realize that this isn't the case. I haven't been trusting my gut and have been swayed by perspectives that are not necessarily fully objective. I really need to start following what is inside of me. While I realize I am not any where close to being a veteran teacher that has all the knowledge of years of experience, I also realize that I'm not clueless. I know more than I've been giving myself credit for. It's time for me to stop second guessing myself and go with what I know is right for me. Am I going to make more mistakes? Yes. Am I going stop being so hard on myself? Hopefully. With age comes wisdom. I get it now.

Sunday, January 18, 2009

Cosmic Hope

I was reading my horoscope for February in a magazine today and here's what it said about work:

Work Mode: Inspired. A new hire won't threaten your success - and could turn out to be the mentor you've been looking for.

We just found out Friday that a the director for the new high school was named and we got to speak with him about future plans. Turns out, he will be able to start visiting our campus twice a week starting next month! I would say it feels like a new chapter for my career, but it feels more like a whole new book. It's exciting to finally have a high school that will offer support and a place to send our students where they can continue on a positive journey. Change really IS coming!!

Saturday, January 17, 2009

Karmic Smack Down

The first few days of 2009 I was trying something new: optimism. This lasted a few days until the universe smacked me with a reality check. The first weekend of the new year I started to have a tooth ache in the back of my mouth. I was sure one of my wisdom teeth was FINALLY starting to push it's way in. So the first week back to school I missed two and a half days running around to the dentist and oral surgeon to have my teeth cut out of my head. I guess the lucky part of all of it was that I've never had any wisdom teeth in the bottom of my mouth, and people tell me that those are the worst. I can't imagine because having the top two out were bad enough. My mom came up to drive me to and from the procedure because they put me to sleep. She stayed around for a few days and stocked my fridge with lots of mushy foods. It was absolutely no fun. And missing work and getting behind and having to play catch up all week was no fun either. I was finally able to eat a good meal at the end of this week, although I still don't have much of an appetite. So, trying to have a renewed sense of optimism about things I kept telling myself that at least it happened now and not the week before contest, or the week of 5th grade band auditions, or during TMEA. Then SMACK - another reality check. I had a major flat tire. I had not driven my car for several days so it had just been sitting in my garage getting flatter by the day. After a friend put my donut tire on, I spent an hour and a half at the tire store only for them to tell me that the tire could not be repaired and I would need a new $200 tire. Great. But they didn't have the tire in stock and I had to go back the next day to get it put on my car. It ended up being a very expensive week for me and I'm not sure I like this optimism stuff. Maybe I'll give it a try again soon when I have more money in my savings account.

Saturday, January 3, 2009

For All You Shamwow Fans Out There

If you watched anything on cable TV over the winter break, then you have met Vince with Shamwow. If you haven't met Vince, then click here to get to know him and how you can clean up spills in fraction of the time.

Today I learned that Vinces pushes more than just the Shamwow, he also pushes the Slap Chop. Click here to see how you can chop anything in a fraction of the time.

I don't know about you, but I can't wait to see what other life changing, time saving gadgets Vince has to offer me in 2009.